People have described Prince Philip as his own man. A man who, despite the institution he married into, maintained his individuality. But many of us live in a world where it is not so easy to identify who we truly are. The media subversively pushes us towards ‘conformity.’ Peer influence encourages us to fit in, follow the latest trends and be the same as everyone else.

For Mongolians, in a country that is rapidly developing, holding on to or finding their personal and national identity is complex. Definitions change. Once people aspired to have large herds of cattle. Today they long for a good education, a lucrative career and a comfortable life. It’s hard not to succumb to trends and the sheer force of others’ opinions and affirmations. Once, a person clearly knew their place in the family. Now, with families rupturing and marriages failing, ambiguities reign.

And amongst our Mongolian friends we see fear lurking as they try to find acceptance and gain connectivity. Their constant efforts to fit in and be the person they imagine others will accept takes its toll.

But striving to belong is not solely the disease of Mongolians or non-Christians. It is amongst Christians too; I recognise it is in myself. Countless times, I’ve tried to be someone other than myself, only to be disappointed when the pretence quickly collapses. Did I foolishly think I could really change myself, or worse still, save myself?

It is only in realising that there is no real life apart from God and seeking Him as we are, in our squalid, sinful state, that we find and become our true selves. Coming to Him, we find acceptance as His divine love touches us in an act that changes us forever. His touch enables us to embrace the reality of who we are. Only then can we truly surrender our all to Him. His full, unconditional acceptance of this sinner helps me accept myself. Because an encounter with God is an encounter with His mercy. He takes my squalor and begins to change the unloveliness into something beautiful for Him.

Trusting ourselves to God gives us an identity that is eternal and the dawn of a new revelation: we are of inestimable value to Him. This truth is astounding! My worth does not lie in what I do but in who I am.

I want to trust in God alone and walk in His way, but my eye is frequently diverted and I miss His presence in my life. My heart cries: Lord, give me discernment to see you. Let your divine love define me, anchor me where I belong and assure me that my identity is found in you alone. And in that identity, which every fibre of my being longs for, lies uniqueness: the uniqueness you created in me.

Yes, God has made every single person a unique individual. We are not to try and be like another or follow the world’s trends but we are to live as the person He created us to be. We are not perfect and we are continually learning to be ourselves in Him. Guarding the truth, letting it grow in us and living beyond pretence, brings peace but also a confidence that is other worldly. And that confidence points people towards God and their true identity.

© copyright Gillian Newham 2021